Exercising Some Baseball & Family Demons

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27 September

Exercising Some Baseball & Family Demons

I'm hoping the last week of St Louis Cardinals baseball is a bad dream. You know the kind where you fall hopelessly and you die when you hit the ground. But you never do. I'm hoping they wake up to find them still alive in October. But I'm not holding out much hope. Join me over here for my latest diatribe.

Again I have to apologize for not making the rounds. Sleep has still been claiming my nights after (and sometimes before) the kids go to bed. I visited with my doctor last week and he said I have a classic case of sleep apnea. Unfortunately, because of my health insurance, I need to see a pulmonary specialist who can then recommend a sleep study. In a best-case scenario, I'll see relief just before Thanksgiving. I just hope I don't turn into Rip Van Winkle before then. The good news is that Prudence is just a week away from receiving her CPAP machine as a result of her sleep study. She had one night with one in her follow-up test and said she felt like a new woman. Well, I kind of like the current woman she is, but if it means she'll be awake more, maybe it'll be worth it.

In other news, my dad and I are at odds. I had to make a tough phone call 3 weeks ago about an issue he's been dealing with for almost 2 years. Its a pretty serious one. If the other party weren't as nice and kind, he could be facing some serious legal issues. But it came to a head and I had to confront him with it. I lost my cool and said some things that I wish I could take back. What's worse is that this issue is now the "elephant in the room" that I can't ignore anymore, even tho he can. I can't call and make small talk with him anymore with the feelings I have burning inside me. So I haven't called him. I emailed him this weekend with an apology and an explanation for my absence on the phone. He replied, barely acknowledging either. So, when I'm not sleeping, I'm worried about our relationship. This has done wonders for my life with Prudence and the kids - not. Before you ask, I am seeking professional counselling. Please be praying for us.

Sorry to leave on a downer note, but sometimes that's where you're at and it can't be helped. Just like the "elephant" with my dad, I can't come here and pretend it's all rosey. But I'm not looking for any pity, either. Only prayers. It's the only thing you can do. And it means everything to me.

Thanks for listening.

00:19 | Blog it

Comments (21)

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	Bethwrote: Chris, Chris, wherefore art thou Chris? Come on back to spaces. I don't have any luck with your other blog. 3 June
	Catherine Farquharwrote: Sometimes life throws things or situations at you that you wish would just go away or you wish never happened. My life threw so many lemons into my life by age 5 that I had to learn to make lemonade!! I will say prayers for you; they truly do work. When you find a quiet moment for yourself, just listen. You just may hear God whispering you an answer. And as I have learned, now turning 50, God never gives you more than you can handle. That's how I make it through the tough days. Things will get better for you if you ask God for help yourself; He won't ever judge you, for you are His special child. I will also call my minisry where thousands of people will be praying for you for 30 days. my best to you. 26 Jan.
	Dory AT LuckyDoritowrote: OK Chris, I am just stopping by to see if you've posted yet. YET, I say. I don't care how slow you type - come on man... just a little something - the natives are getting restless! ;o) Just kidding, take your time...please, take all the time in the world. I'm just happy knowing you're alive and well in your neck of the woods! I'm still praying and I wish you and your family the most wonderful Christmas!! weimie 20 Dec.
	Sue Ableswrote: Glad you're alive Chris. We sure miss you!!! MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY! Sue : ) 17 Dec.
	THOMAS JOHNSONwrote: Hey Man, Nice to know you are still alive and kicking. I thought you would drag tired butt away from the CPAP long enought to talk some Cardinals smack after the series. Nice call on the Homsil! I got all these women commenting that Austin is "going to be OK", like I didn't think he was going to be OK! Jeez. See ya, Tom 8 Dec.
	♥ Aimee Archerwrote: hope you and your dad are doing better.. :o) smiles are contagious...pass one to people that you love and those you don't... :o) 27 Nov.
	Shannonwrote: Chris, I'm praying for you and hope that things are getting better. I miss you! Blessings to you, S :) 25 Oct.
	Kadrinwrote: In my prayers, the lot of you. Not sure what the elephant is between you and your dad, but as everyone else has related, we all have them. Confronting my moms alcoholism was one of the hardest things I ever had to do, but she's been sober now for nearly 10 months, so it was worth it. Hugs, Kat 18 Oct.
	~weimiegirl~ wrote: Hi Chris, Just stopping by to see if you're in a better place. Guess not.... I'll keep the prayers going! Take care, weimie 11 Oct.
	Jean kflwrote: Well..what a week you've had! Believe me, when you get your CPAP you will feel like a new person!;-) But, be warned...it does take a while to get used to it...and a little while to get over the sleep problems you've had for a long time. I've had mine for 5 years, and I can't sleep without it, now...lol About your dad, I'll add you all to my prayer list...good for you for getting counseling..just remember some of it is up to him, too...and remember we're here if you need us! You don't have to be "up" all the time on here..we'll accept you however you are..you're right, we can't be up and happy all the time, and that's why most of us got our blog! So just be honest, and we'll be here.. peace, Jeankfl 4 Oct.
	Bill wrote: Chris, you are one of my closest and dearest friends. Many times you have elevated me when I have been down. You have my thoughts and my prayers.....and a standing offer to provide a ear for you to bend. I am here whenever you need me, my friend. I fully understand that family matters are very difficult to share with others. Do not feel a need to do that. I am here to help in any capacity. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2 Oct.
	晨明徐wrote: Though I don't know what really happened between you and your father,yet I wish you could try your best to solve the problem,try your best to talk with your father.And I hope that you will make it. 2 Oct.
	Shannonwrote: You are in my prayers Chris Blessings to you, S :) 30 Sept.
	THOMAS JOHNSONwrote: I haven't had a real conversation with my mother for four years. Our blow out sounds a lot like yours. I know my mom is not going to change, so I try to be the good son and let her pretend it never happened, but it is still there, and it hurts. I pray you and your dad can handle it better, I know it sucks. I also pray that if you get to try a CPAP, you don't feel like a new woman the next day. :) 29 Sept.
	Emilywrote: I'll be definitely praying for you! I know family situations are the worst to deal with. I know you'll be able to get through this. Just thought I would drop a line of encouragement! 29 Sept.
	Garywrote: Ahhhh..."to sleep. perchance to dream"...ok, just sleep would be nice. Between work and packing / moving preparing for the big move, I've been lucky to get 5 hours / night. As to the issue with your dad, it can be tough tiptoeing around issues, but listen to Beth, life is way too short, try to spend what time you can. It'll all be worth it in the long run. 29 Sept.
	Caffeinated Librarianwrote: Re. the CPAP (although I didn't know that was its name) - Morelli had one and from what he said it really helped him. My dad also had sleep apnea, although they didn't have many treatments then and he refused to go to the doctor anyway...so I'm glad to see that you and Prudence are looking into treatment. As for the rest, I know that you've struggled with this before and I'm sorry that you're having to deal with it again. My mom and I went through our own rough patches in our relationship and we've both had problems dealing with my grandparents, so I know how painful it can be. But you are a good person - I know that as sure as I know my own name - and you will do the best you can. And that is all anyone can ask of you. My thoughts and prayers will be with you as always. 27 Sept.
	~weimiegirl~ wrote: That's the best part about blogging.... there's no need to pretend it's all rosey, like most of us do in our day to day lives. There's nothing like the strain of a parent-child relationship, believe me, I know... so I just wanted to let you know - I'm praying for you too. Take care of yourslef! weimie 27 Sept.
	Michellewrote: I love what you said in your last paragraph. You don't need pity, just prayers. Isn't that the truth for all of us. I hope you get through this with your dad. We have been through the same thing with my in-laws and still tiptoe around that elephant. It's a shame, but such is life. I will keep you in my prayers. 27 Sept.
	Bethwrote: Life is very short. I hope things get better for you and your dad. 27 Sept.

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